who was your first kiss?
by elmsvuur
Summary: As a parent, you can expect this question to be asked somewhere in your parenting life. Too bad for Naruto and Sasuke, they didn't. One-shot, takes place after the Boruto movie. Rated T for some language and Sakura's... aggressive tendencies. NEW AUTHOR ALERT, SO REVIEWS ARE ALWAYS WELCOME!


**So, this is just a random thing I thought of. I mean come on, won't it be hilarious? I won't give you spoilers, just a disclaimer. I don't own Naruto, Naruto Shippuden or whatever else you can come up with. I do, however, own my ideas. So here it is!**

 **Ps. don't judge me. I like subs better than dubs, but using dattebayo is like trying to say "look at me! I know a Japanese word that has no meaning at all!" (Notice my sarcasm), so you'll just have to do with the English version.**

One shot  
Who was your first kiss?

It's been some time since the disastrous chuunin exam. They were planning to restart the exam all together, giving everyone a new chance. This, of course, meant a lot of work for the hokage, aka Naruto. Seeing as he wasn't the person to simply 'take a break', Sakura and Hinata decided that it was time for some quality time with both Uzumaki and Uchiha families. Which is why they suggested a picnic (not that the others had much say in it). Boruto was slowly eating his sandwich, meanwhile listening to the story his mom was telling. "Wow, really?" sparkles could be seen in Himawari's eyes. Boruto swallowed the bite he took and scoffed.

"Look, there is no way the two of you flew to the moon and kissed. It's impossible." He ignored the glare send by Sarada. Not his problem she liked those romantic stories. "As a matter of fact, we did! Believe it!" his shitty dad replied proudly, like he planned it all. Boruto just rolled his eyes. "Ah, I really wish I had a romantic kiss like that" Sakura sighed, throwing a suggestive look at her husband who pointedly ignored it. "We've kissed before" "one time, and only because we were marrying" she pouted. But she loved him either way.

"Ne, daddy?" Himawari looked at her father with big eyes. "Yes Hima?" "Who was your first kiss?" Naruto spit out his drink, while Sasuke started choking on his sandwich. This made Boruto slightly interested. His dad was an idiot, so it was normal for him to react so strongly, but Sarada's dad? It was like asking a statue to smile. Impossible! At least, so he thought.

Sakura got a sneaky smile on her face. "Yeah, let's tell her that story. We're all dying to hear." Kami, sometimes Naruto thought that Sakura was the evil incarnated. "W-well, uhm… actually" Boruto got irritated "Just tell us already!" "Is there a meaning to this?" Sasuke asked, actually looking abashed. "Oh, come on. You're just embarrassed because you lost your first kiss to that idiot." Sakura pointed at the blonde hokage, who was still stammering.

It went very still. You could see both Boruto and Sarada processing that information. They looked at their fathers, who were both looking away. Himawari just looked innocently, not really seeing the problem. One could count down the seconds till impact. 3…2…1… "WHAT THE HELL!?" both teammates exclaimed. Boruto actually started looking sick, although Sarada wasn't really better off. "You're… kidding right?" Boruto really hoped so. "It… was an accident, okay" Naruto tried to justify himself "I was just standing there and someone pushed me into him." Sasuke looked at the blonde, eyes showing that he solely blamed him "You were standing on a table, with your face mere inches from mine."

This got Naruto's attention "You're saying it was my fault, teme?" "Don't see who else's it could be, dobe" but before a fight could start Sakura intervened, laughing like her life depended on it. "Oh man, that reaction was even better than I'd hoped! Your faces!" she kept laughing for a while, Hinata giggling with her. Sarada, who looked less… shocked then before, decided to voice her concerns. "B-but mamma, aren't you disappointed about not sharing your first kisses?" Boruto rolled his eyes again 'damn romantic'. "At first I was, but now it just makes a good laugh. Besides, I can do a 'second kiss'."

"Or third" Naruto corrected without thinking, regretting it directly afterwards. Sasuke looked at him like he'd gone mad. "What was that?" Sakura asked confused, but when she saw the scared looks on both her husbands' and Naruto's faces, realization dawned on her. "You… didn't, did you?" their looks betrayed them "YOU DID!?" "Look Sakura, it was an accident. We were falling of a waterfall and just got closer and…" Naruto slapped his hands together, hoping to clear everything up, while instead it made everything worse.

"So all this time I thought I at least had Sasuke's second kiss, ONLY TO HEAR THAT YOU STOLE THAT ONE TOO!?" it finally dawned on the others what the problem was. Boruto ran to a nearby tree, needing to empty his stomach. Sarada followed soon after. First kiss they could stomach, gross but doable. But a second one? Hell no! I mean come on, those were their dads they were talking about! Himawari just kept looking with those innocent eyes, still not really seeing a problem, while her mother just stared with a shocked look. Naruto finally truly understood the danger he was in and started backing away.

"Look, it was an accident, believe it! Besides, Sasuke is just as much to blame as me!" He saw a shift in Sakura's posture. A shift he knew all too well. Just in time he jumped away from her deadly fist "SHANNARO!" 'Crap!' was all he could think before he had to run away from the destructive force named Sakura.

Sasuke watched them go, Naruto desperately evading Sakura's attacks. Seriously, what did he think saying something like that? Knowing him, he probably didn't think at all "Idiot." But just as he turned his attention back to his food, he sensed danger coming from something, or better said someone, in front of him. Looking up, he saw Hinata looking down, letting her hair cover her eyes. "I know I didn't have Naruto's first kiss" she stood up, actually succeeding in intimidating the ex-missing nin. "Or the second, or even the third or fourth." She made a step forward. Not taking any chances, Sasuke backed up. "But until now, it was either the enemy stealing a kiss or some random girl we would never see again, thanking him for a 'job well done'." She looked up, showing her activated byakugan. "I'm done with this!" Sasuke wanted to tell her how unfair it was to blame him for all the times her husband kissed an other girl. But even though he defeated Orochimaru, his brother and even sealed a god, Hinata in this state was on a whole different level.

So he ran.

* * *

 **Wow, I actually did it. You don't want to know how many times I tried writing this story, only to end up with something I wasn't pleased with. BUT I DID IT! And actually with a little over a 1000 words! (Which was my goal). Seeing as I'm a starting author, I would appreciate it if I got some reviews. I really hope it made you guys laugh as hard as me, because that would mean a job well done. So, first one-shot done, hopefully more to come! Peace out!**

 **x-elmsvuur-x**


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